Brian P Posted December 11, 2002 Author Report Share Posted December 11, 2002 you just want me to have a shitty hand Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
88regal Posted December 11, 2002 Report Share Posted December 11, 2002 Now maybe this is too crafty, but if you're banking on some big results, here's one to try. Officially I don't reccommend, but... The idea is take a bedsheet and tie twine or string to each of the sheet's four corners. Then tie the ends of each together. What you'll have will be a bit like a parachute. Take a marker or some paint and write an especially obscene message, like "I am The Cockmaster" or something. Then just tie the thing to his rear bumper and stuff the chute up under it just lightly enough so that when he's driving to work the next day, the wind will pop the chute on the freeway. The best part is he'll have a hard time explaining to the cop that he isn't the one who put it there. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brian P Posted December 11, 2002 Author Report Share Posted December 11, 2002 LOL...considering what he drives, I think the parachute will keep him from reaching 40mph!~ However I think I may have to do this to my sister one day....it'll say something like "for a great time call 395-5265 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
88regal Posted December 11, 2002 Report Share Posted December 11, 2002 For those who want to avoid Turd-Fondling Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Anonymous Posted December 11, 2002 Report Share Posted December 11, 2002 For those who want to avoid Turd-Fondling Brian likes turds! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JPaganel Posted December 11, 2002 Report Share Posted December 11, 2002 I haven't tried this myself, but my dad swears his budy did. They shoved a plastic shopping bag into a guys gas tank. Now, the bag, being made of polyethylene, shouldn't dissolve. It floated around the tank, occasionally wrapping itself around the fuel pump intake and killing the engine. When the car stopped the bag floated away and then floated back at a random time to kill the engine again. The guy had one hell of a time diagnosing that one, paid a buttload of money to various mechanics and finally burned out his fuel pump. The best part? Gasoline will dissolve any fingerprints. :devil: "Gee, that's too bad. How'd that get in there?" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
88regal Posted December 11, 2002 Report Share Posted December 11, 2002 Sinister... but good. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chronic139 Posted December 11, 2002 Report Share Posted December 11, 2002 that ones nice. I got another one. the only problem is you have to get under the hood (probably not happening). Rice in the rad. When it heats up the rice expands and then its time for an engine. I havent done this but a buddy of mine did it to someone. HAHAHAHAHAHA. I laughed my ass off when I heard it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ismellrealbad Posted December 11, 2002 Report Share Posted December 11, 2002 how is the bag i nthe gas tank gunna work? dont gas tank have some kinda block that stop people from sticking hoses in to cyphen out gas? id think the openings would be too small for a bag to be sucked in gastank idea:i heard sugar is the most devastating dogshit idea: get fido's shit ( at least 3 good turds) and place one on the roof first (this draws a WTF? reaction in his mind) then place one under each doorhandle. its like a double dose!!! tire idea: dont use nails use screws, flatter the head the better. a screw is shorter and more likeley to not slide out when being first run over, but instead will puncture. place the screw on a 45* angle from the tire but wedged into it. if u dunno what i meanill draw it in paint tire idea 2:the pebble idea is good, but to the person that said they removed the valvestems - heres a story. back in HS i was a naughty boy and got my parking space revoked. well i kept parking in it anyway and eventually they assigned to the space to some other kid. i still kept parking in it knowing i was fuckin that kid over (i knew him and hated him and got a kick out of it) and one day i came out to my car and 2 flat tires. well DUHHHH i knew who it was. so a bunch of people helped me out while i was in class and got stems put em in and inflated my tireds. after school me and a friend went over to his house to beat his fucking ass. i tracked his house down using mapquest and the school directory. he was home cuz i saw his car there and after 5 mins of yelling pounding on the door noone answered. he's lucky or his face would have been rearranged. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bumping z34 Posted December 11, 2002 Report Share Posted December 11, 2002 bondo his doors shut! i did that to a kid in college it was great! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JPaganel Posted December 11, 2002 Report Share Posted December 11, 2002 how is the bag i nthe gas tank gunna work? dont gas tank have some kinda block that stop people from sticking hoses in to cyphen out gas? id think the openings would be too small for a bag to be sucked in. It doesn't need to be a whole bag, a half a bag would work. It would get pushed in by the flow of gas next time he fills up. At least in theory... If nothing else, he would have one hell of a time refueling... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
J Posted December 11, 2002 Report Share Posted December 11, 2002 fuk it superglue his wipers to his windshield and a littel glue on the lock cylinders wouldn't hurt either. But i would still put a gay pride sticker on his bumper that said something like *honk if you love cock too* LMAO later Jay Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ismellrealbad Posted December 11, 2002 Report Share Posted December 11, 2002 hahahaha, gay pride....well he is being a fag so it would work niceley. i like that parachute too. fuck it, go all out and get a fucking penis decal the entire size of his back window. rofl thatll show his true colors Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SuperBuick Posted December 11, 2002 Report Share Posted December 11, 2002 You just want me to have a shitty hand ........so............and your point is......... -T Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted December 11, 2002 Report Share Posted December 11, 2002 I know that this sounds kinda stupid, but go to a locksmith and get a couple of door keys made, then you stick them into his door lock cylinders and break them off inside it. you can also do that with twigs. If it is late at night, make sure that the doors are locked. It is an inconvience (especially if he does not have keyless entry, power locks, or an alarm that will unlock the doors with a remote) seeing that he will not be able to lock the doors, and will have to pay for a locksmith to get the car open. Taylor Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
J Posted December 11, 2002 Report Share Posted December 11, 2002 God we are a evil group! AND I LOVE IT :devil: :devil: :devil: :cuss: :verymad: :flip: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brian P Posted December 11, 2002 Author Report Share Posted December 11, 2002 fuk it superglue his wipers to his windshield and a littel glue on the lock cylinders wouldn't hurt either. But i would still put a gay pride sticker on his bumper that said something like *honk if you love cock too* LMAO later Jay HAHAHA!! Oh man you guys are killing me here! well here's the latest, I got home (after being poisoned by vaporized coolant, but more on that later) of course his car is now straight since the bitch is home. I went to go take my dog out and he's like "I went already" now Im not about to search the area for fresh dog shit so I'll wait till tomorrow. I think fresh warm shit should smear the best. And it would be SO EASY to smear it right across the trunklid cause I'll be acting like Im just walking back to my door and SSSMMMEEEAAAARRR!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brian P Posted December 11, 2002 Author Report Share Posted December 11, 2002 Oh yeah the vaporized coolant. I just replaced the heater core about 2 months ago with a known good used one, but now THAT one is leaking! son of a !!! On the way home I forgot to set the temp to "cool" so heated air was slowly coming through the defroster vents (thank you American car "pass through ventilation") instantly there's an oily shitty layer of fog on all front windows, also since it's in the air it got on other things: steering wheel, hands, and I got the coolant taste in my mouth. I should have known better than to use spare cooling system parts, at least now I can get a new core that flows ACTUAL HEAT! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
J Posted December 11, 2002 Report Share Posted December 11, 2002 :worship: :yikes: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SuperBuick Posted December 11, 2002 Report Share Posted December 11, 2002 I think fresh warm shit should smear the best. And it would be SO EASY to smear it right across the trunklid cause I'll be acting like Im just walking back to my door and SSSMMMEEEAAAARRR!!! THATS THE SPIRIT!!!! Gotta get it in more places than that though...someplace he has to touch. otherwise....he can just go to the carwash and boost it right off. Doorhandles are a must. just walk by and cremate them. -Tom Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ismellrealbad Posted December 11, 2002 Report Share Posted December 11, 2002 you hjave to go all out at 3am when noone is out...do what ur heart pleases. its the only way to go. there wont be any FRESH dogshit but u can still find some and wedge it under the handles. its just as nasty...is there any kind of small particle stuff that ants or insects are attracted to? you could pour it in the cracks and watch bugs take over....wait fuck its not the summer damnit Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted December 11, 2002 Report Share Posted December 11, 2002 try doing stuff to the back of the car (he is least likely to notice that) get a burnz-a-matic, and melt his taillights or something (I did that to my ex's Jaguar). They will not notice that right away, and it is a pain to get new taillights (not to mention that he can get pulled over for it). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted December 11, 2002 Report Share Posted December 11, 2002 also, about sugar in the gas tank: When you combine sugar with gasoline, you get a homemade version of NAPALM. My stepdad would use that stuff to help with burning tree trunks seeing that it becomes a jelly version of gasoline, and doesn't flow. Taylor Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted December 11, 2002 Report Share Posted December 11, 2002 with the bad in the gas tank, use a small bag like you get at waldbaums. It will go right in. Just make it long and thin, and push it in. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted December 11, 2002 Report Share Posted December 11, 2002 I just remembered a couple of good ones that my stepdad told me about. There are several versions of this, but they are all annoying. Get a potato, cut it in half, and cram it into his tailpipe. Wrap it with tape, and viola, his car will not start. Get a coke can, cut the top off, put a hole in the bottom (no bigger than a half inch), and ram the can into the exhaust pipe. Put tape on it (duct tape for both) to hold it in. When he starts the car, and drives off, it will make a HORRIBLE wistling noise that will drive just about anybody insane. Taylor Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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